The 'Immortal Barring Accidents' Blues [Classic CS5M)

The IBA Blues

I've got the immortal barring accidents blues
I've lived through twelve centuries of rain
1837 was particularly grim, and I'll never go to Hull again.
So don't force me to explain, just
Pass me that poisoned chalice baby
I need to fall on my knife
I want to have taken a cocktail of pills
And tiptoed away from life

Chorus

Like ole mister Rasputin / I need to find some friends who like puttin the boot in
So stab me, shoot me, electrocute me
Don't put down that axe while you still think I'm cute me.
Chop me in little pieces that float around in spain
The odds are that by tea-time I'll be back again.


I've got the immortal barring accidents blues
I've lived through twelve centuries of rain
I've seen everyone who loved me end up in the ground
So don't force me to expound, just
Pass me that bitter almond smelling cake
I want to shuffle off this coil
Help me poise this electric appliance at the edge of my bath
I' m done tuckered out with toil.

I've got the immortal barring accidents blues
Note I'm not urging suicide for younger fellers
Life for the young's more magical than a dozen Uri Gellers
But I've lived before anesthetics and through dental pain
So don't force me to explain, just
Strap me to a treetrunk heading for the white-water
With my shorts full of reactive potassium
With remote-control piranha snapping like the horta
Tell the local thugs that I've been out and sassing 'em.

I've got the immortal barring accidents blues
You name it I've survived it. Krakatoa east of java
Was like coffee to me, I lit up a havana and was blown out to sea
I was cooking beans at Tulcumguska
Don't ask me why I didn’t die just take it on trust, yeah?
Hit me with a bo-staff and all your might
Show me the way to a nuclear test sight
I'll take my pyjamas and I'll wish you night night
And the next time that you see me I'll be glowing bright.


[A word perhaps of explanation for the non-Doctor Who fan readers of this blog
if any. 'Floating about in spain' is a famous fluff for 'floating about in space',
and, 'immortal barring accidents' is what the second Doctor once claimed his people, 'the Time Lords' to be. This is the *real* Classic CS5M and has even been performed by good, real musicians, at least once. Hi Zap!]