On seeking absolution on a full stomach

Strap me to your rack, Torquemada
As things are going you can do your worst
I confess I ate all the cake from the larder
And now I feel as if I'm going to burst.

Stare at me now severely Savonarola
I know my life's not been lived as you would
But I can't face my fears on just granola
And that is why I ate up all the pud.

Pray for me if you can St. Francis
As you would pray for any lamb of course
I always find with lamb though that my glance is
Distracted by the roasties and mint sauce.